you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
