You don't have asthma, your pregnant
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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