I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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