Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
