A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
well I can't set my house on fire every night
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
