there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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