Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
