On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize