Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
