I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
