Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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