Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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