Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
