I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
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