Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
