Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
