I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
