my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
smell my finger.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
