Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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