I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
