normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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