i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Randomize
