And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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