I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
My day in three words: secret purse cake
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
