Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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