too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
