Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize