If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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