gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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