She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
