It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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