well you can't waste a boner
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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