I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
