His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
