Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
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