Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
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