Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Randomize
