when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I don't think brook has ever known best
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Randomize
