This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
