How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Every concussion has its silver lining
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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