after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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