therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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