Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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