plz talk dirty to me
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
