She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I just want to make out with him forever
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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