I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I should be sponsored by Trojan
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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