she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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