I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
