Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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