So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
