You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
