And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
